her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
Randomize