This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
Randomize
