dude i'm inner monologue high
i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
Not only did a random toaster end up in my house last night, it's also full of skittles.
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
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