I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
Her breakfeast in bed consisted of half a pop tart that I didn't want, and water that I slipped birth control into... Who says chivalry is dead?
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
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