I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
Randomize
