Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
So many bounce houses so little time
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
I'm just waiting til he drunkenly pisses in his new man's car the way he always whipped it out and went Bellagio in mine.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
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