He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
"it's Wednesday" isn't a good enough excuse to take my debit card and use it for your own drunken needs. You owe me 250 bro
You just stood up, raised your glass and said, "I'd like to thank the academy" then fell through a glass table. THAT'S why we cut you off.
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
Randomize
