oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
nothing like a call from your drunk grandpa at midnight on a wednesday to ask your parents if you're registered to vote...
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
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