i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
Dear Penis Owner...our records show that you are overdue for servicing...please contact our friendly associates to schedule a thoroughly satisfying experience today...operators are standing by...
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Randomize
