oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
I'm going to go ahead and refrain from sexting you in an airport that is currently at a "level orange" security threat.
I forget how to act sober
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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