I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
The only way i can get arrested is public drunkenness or defacing a national monument. Trust me, i have already looked it up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
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