Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
75% of the time I swipe right on Bumble for girls over 40 is because I think their 18 year old daughter is hot.
Randomize