Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
Drunk version of me is like a sleeping demon inside of me that awakes to the sound of vodka
Randomize
