i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
All signs point to mom being high. 1) making chicken at 2 am. 2) dancing to smooth jazz. 3) she asked where the peanut butter was
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
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