one word: firstdatebathroomanal
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
What happened last night? I just woke up and there's like 15 mcflurry cups on the floor
You don't remember stealing them?
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
Randomize
