Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
There r osticjed everywhere
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
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