Well apparently he's into motor boating.
If Rob Pattinson gets another fucking MTV award, I'm going to vomit.
I'm not even planning on drinking that much tonight.. but I'm writing "emergency contact number" and your number on my hand just in case
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
Yeah I don't even know dude. This shit has reached new levels of ridiculous. Let's hope baby Jesus gallops down a rainbow on a sparkling unicorn and wills that bitch clean. I think that's the best chance we've got.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Randomize
