standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
Just called my dad drunk from bed to ask for bacon.. my niece texted me when it was ready.. i'm never moving out
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
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