dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
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