guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
I convinced her last night that my actual nickname was "No Condom John"
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I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
Oh god. It's my first day here, I'm still drunk and somebody just drifted in a forklift. I'm going to die.
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
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I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
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