You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
Side note: I apologize for sex being the subject of every single one of my texts. That's what happens when you date an older man who constantly denies you sex on the basis of his ridiculous morals.
Randomize
