i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
No more cocaine. I spent two hours in my bathroom convincing myself I was ugly. Is this what a period feels like?
You're the worst gay friend ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up to you singing What Makes You Beautiful and trying to blend an avocado with vodka.
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
Randomize