Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
She only remembers me when she's drunk. It's like I'm a suppressed memory that only surfaces with alcohol.
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
Randomize
