Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
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