Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
one of my coworkers wanted to look something up on YouTube on my tablet. I didn't know how to explain why my most recent search was "girl fucks dog."
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
Randomize
