put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
I want you more than these girls want KFC
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
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