New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
what day is it and did you see me today?
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
He was the drug dealer that jumped out of his car to get my number
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
Randomize
