Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
as we were stuffing their 24 of beer into our bags you kept saying you wanted cheese strings. closest things we found were kraft singles. as the guys came up the stairs you kept screaming 'GET THE CHEESE! GET THE CHEESE!'
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
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