that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
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