If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
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