OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
I'm pretty sure his head is too big to fit between my legs. Worthless.
I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here.
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
Is it penis luge time yet?
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
whose parrot is this?
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
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