okay pat passed out under dana's car
remember when u banged some random dude twice in the back restaurant room of the bar i work at with customers still there? and woke up with an enormous highschool-sized hickey this morning? no big deal.
the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
Police were just in my backyard to recover a loaded .38. What the fuck?????
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
You thought you were Snapchating on your tablet, but were really just poking John Stamos' face on my Full House dvd case...
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
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