I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
I almost didn't wake up for my first day of work. The 3rd bottle of champagne was a mistake. And the 2nd bottle of wine after that was probably excessive
You fell asleep mid BJ last night. I put your pants back on you. My ego is pretty bruised this morning.
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
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