And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
My ex came to my place while I was gone. Random things he took: snow shoes, my laundry quarters, a decorative picture, all my condiments, the container that held my rice and a sticker off my wallet. Then left a note saying he watered my plants and fed my cats. What. The. Fuck.
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
I finally realized he drank way too much when he tried serenading me to the song "come my lady" while slowly and creepily making his way toward me...keeping constant eye contact.
Randomize
