I swear she didn't look like that last week.
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
My dad just asked Siri to "help me find my daughters dignity."
If you were my daughter, I'd do the same thing.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
Randomize
