I just met lou reed's venus in furs. Her hands are slippery.
i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
I'm pretty sure I just had a convo with my hot pockets about how they weren't good enough for the oven.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
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