After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
The only thing the cop asked me is..... "how are you still alive"?
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
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