White coat. Heels.
She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
My mom comes home from her weekend with her lesbian co-workers and asks "You wanna know how I got these bruises?" I've never been more torn about anything EVER.
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
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