so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
I'm your Election Erection Connection
I retroactively revoke all sex we've ever had.
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize