So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
I just pulled a feather out of my vagina.
I am not joking.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
And then my night got REAL pukey
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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