you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
You told the cops that they couldn't arrest you because they weren't hot enough to fuck
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
my mom asked me why i was covered in scratches, blood, and dirt this morning..i answered "i was planking obviously" and walked away
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Randomize
