You're completely useless in the revolution.
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
Randomize
