he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
The beer is more important than you right now.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
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