at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
I need to move out. I just walk of shamed my way into a family breakfast party. There's no response when grandma says "where you coming from in heels at 9AM?"
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
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