Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
That awkward moment when you realize you've been secretly blackout dating someone for three months. Drunk me is in a committed relationship.
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