You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Randomize
