You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
Dude. Where are you? There's a hot chick drunkenly dancing on the bar and aggressively taking shots to Pink songs. She looks like she needs a rebound. Get. Here. Now.
FUCK NYC TRAFFIC.
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
What's the polite way to say "hey I don't actually want to fuck you, I just swiped right on you because you didn't like me in high school and I needed validation"
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
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