My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
i would totally switch to progressive if they'd let me bang that girl in the commercial.
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
I've decided to become a librarian so I can drunkenly quote The Mummy and have it be legit.
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
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