Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
My liver is preforming stress tests.
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
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