Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
apparently my drunken alterego is a lazyeyed bisexual.
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
Broken heels while double fisting margaritas, picking up shirtless, bloody men and escorting them out of harms way, the meltdown when I realized I can go without a bra bc my boobs shrunk, the morning vodka red bull you were forced to drink? Which one roped you in?
Randomize
