My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
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